Monday 8 October 2012

Men's Mid-Season Musings: 2012


1.     Guelph – Once again, they stand head-and-shoulders above the throng of the CIS. But their mightier-than-thou mindset may be their undoing in the only race that will actually a challenge for them: the race with past year’s teams. Does the current team match up against the one from 2010, where they almost scored a perfect 15 at OUAs, and the one from 2011, where every scorer was first team AC? Mid-distance dynamo and lactose-intolerant Tommy Lecours seems to be doing well keeping up with the big 3 (Nixon, Proudfoot, and Hendrikx) so if Sikubwabo can pull it together, these guys have a legitimate opportunity to do so.

2.  Victoria – Historically, these guys have done well at the dance racing as little as possible (makes us wonder why more Ontario teams don’t try it) and this year should be no different. Callipygian superman Dylan Haight and fictional-character-come-to-life Ryan Cassidy lead their squad of fellow Norsemen (Oxland, Clouthier, Therrien and spellcheck’s worst nightmare Pstotka) that should, on paper, do well at the party. Hulse’s guilt complex seems to be keeping him from competition as he or his cheek bones have yet to be seen this year.  Also, we’ve heard rumours Olivier Collin is floating around the City of Newly Weds and Nearly Deads, scoring dates with sun-kissed surfer chicks and helping little old ladies across the street, so it’s no wonder he appears not to be competing this year.

3.  Queen’s – Between Archer, Patterson, McGraw, Cashin, Loney, and Costen, they should be able to put 5 into the top 30, which has historically been good enough for a medal. Of note, All-Canadian and Oreo cookie connoisseur Jeff Archer hopes to build off a breakout season he had during last year’s championship races. Whether or not they have a treasure trove of the running equivalent to Oompa-Loompas, that would virtually guarantee them a medal, remains to be seen. If this were any other team, we might drop them to 4th or 5th. Being Queen’s, we’re comfortable leaving them in the medals, at least for now.

4. Windsor – Despite having lost 3 of their 5 scorers, this team continues to roll. First-team AC and facial hair purveyor Matt Walters is riding the momentum of a strong track campaign, yet the health of Janikowski (sat out last week due to injury) remains in question. The rookies Master and Cooper are not as garbage as we initially thought them to be and vets Kegel, Meloche, and Falk seem to be able to deal with the added weight on their shoulders, despite the strong possibility of lack of weight training.

5. McMaster – Seem to be falling out of favour in the race for 2nd, despite not having fledged a full team yet. Being chalk full of triathletes, we feel we have to give credit where credit is due. Sanders, Darlington, and Walsh have had strong showings already this year, and guys like Reid, Bowes, and Bierema are looming off in the distance, ready to pounce all over the rest of the CIS. The winner of this year’s race for second will be decided more by quantity than quality, and these guys have more talent than the Walking Dead had zombies in last season’s finale. Don’t let us down…

6. Laval – If these guys had as many good CIS races as they had number of names, they would be medal favourites for sure. Unfortunately, the team of JS Lapointe, Chuck PT, Boisvert, Labranche, and JSFD are in tough again this year. Losing head-to-head against Windsor at Western with almost a full squad doesn’t bode well for these guys. Neither does moving up 20 points in the second half of that race; we blame the cultural barrier and believe their pacing may be off due to the difference between the Quebec meaning and the Ontario meaning of what constitutes a kilometre. A strong possibility remains these guys run out of gas come November due to recent years’ flops at national championships this year’s strength of the RSSQ as a whole (most of them probably consider the RSSQ to be the national championship anyways). Still, if their maple syrup rations hold, they might yet surprise us.

7. Regina – Apparently we neglected to mention this team had Wyatt Baiton in the last issue. Sorry Wyatt, but we don’t apologize for the mistakes we make here at P&P. Furthermore, it’s more of a blessing to go unmentioned on these things. Did you not just read the smack-down we gave Laval? Anyways, 4 deep is good enough secure this spot, and if game-changers Fyfe and Johnson run well they could even scrape into the top 5. No pressure boys.

8. Toronto – No standouts, but a solid team through and through. Plus, they’re probably the nicest group of guys you’d ever meet. I’d be totally cool with any one of them dating my sister, if I had one. So yeah, 8th.


First Team AC: Wiebe, Nixon, Proudfoot, Walters, Hendrikx, Haight, Sanders

Second Team AC: Lecours, Sikubwabo, Archer, Loney, Janikowski, Darlington, Cassidy